He's NUMBER ONE! He's NUMBER ONE!

Happy Tuesday Followers (AKA my Mom)-


First off-I apologize for my lack of blogging since Thanksgiving. To be honest, there have been so many good things to blog about these past five days that I've been overwhelmed with options. To give you a sense of this dilemma, here are just a few stories I considered blogging about...

I considered blogging about how Ndamukong Suh is, quite possibly, the biggest douche bag in sports history. There is not an OUNCE of class in his bones. He releases this half-ass apology and then receives, what I think to be, a very easy punishment. Then he complains about his two-game suspension and decides to APPEAL the ban. The nerve. No wonder he came from Nebraska.

HEY NEBRASKA! REMEMBER THIS???

I considered blogging about the firing of-let's face it-a bazillion coaches within the last couple of days. My favorite headline: "Zook gets the Hook!"

I considered blogging about the fact that BASKETBALL is BACK, but I didn't want to hold my breath, ya know? I'm dreaming of a Bulls Christmas! 

I considered blogging about this little rumor that's spreading around town. Apparently, Mike Martz is considering leaving the Bears for the head coach position at Arizona State. Hmm....Most people might be a little discouraged by this information, but me?

Well, this is how I feel about it....

I considered blogging about Patrick Sharp's AMAZING HAT TRICK, or as I like to call it, a PAT TRICK, in Friday's game.

I considered blogging about Urban Meyer becoming the new head coach of Ohio State. What a douche. It's one thing if I don't like Urban Meyer, it's another if Richard Blais from Top Chef hates him: "Can't wait to belt out my chant next time Gators get to see Meyer... "Urban Liar" clap clap clap clap clap..." (brought to you by Richard's twitter account).

I considered blogging about the hilarity that was Jason Witten running into a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader as he was pushed out of bounds in Thursday's game. Ha. the. best.
In case you missed it.....

I considered ALL of my options. I could've made jokes and posted videos. I even could've photoshopped a picture of Ron Zook, but that just takes too much time.

What I finally decided to blog about today is journalistic "gold"en showers....

Please watch....

Nick Novak. My kicker for my fantasy football team: The Dirty Mark Sanchez's, is caught peeing on the sideline. The questions I have are: Did he pee in a gatorade cup? And did he give said cup to Tim Tebow after the Chargers lost? We may never know, but I can always hope.